Stephen Colbert Was Disinvited From Obama’s Birthday Occasion

Stephen Colbert Was Disinvited From Obama’s Birthday Occasion

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Stephen Colbert opened “The Late Present” on Monday with a narrative of “being disinvited from the cool child’s social gathering” that was former President Barack Obama’s sixtieth birthday on Martha’s Winery over the weekend.

“Right here’s the factor — a sizzling ticket is what it was, however given the entire pandemic factor and the Delta variant, a celeb mosh pit was possibly not the wisest selection, so Obama determined to cut back the visitor record for his social gathering,” Colbert defined.

Colbert mentioned there have been experiences claiming that fellow late-night hosts Conan O’Brien and David Letterman, Colbert’s predecessor, had been axed from the visitor record, however that he made the minimize.

“Yeah, I imply, it is smart — I’m recognized to fill in when Letterman drops out of one thing.” — STEPHEN COLBERT

Colbert clarified that whereas he had deliberate to attend the social gathering, “Within the huge scaling again, I received massively scaled.”

“By the way in which, Mr. Former President, my very own sixtieth birthday is developing in three years, and also you, sir, aren’t … going to need to miss it. Please come. I’d be so honored should you got here. I’ll scale me again to make room for you — and Michelle, clearly.” — STEPHEN COLBERT

“The 2020 Tokyo Olympics ended yesterday, and the U.S. athletes introduced dwelling 39 gold medals, 41 silvers, 33 bronze and 4 new variants.” — SETH MEYERS

“Properly, final night time was the closing ceremony for the 2020 Tokyo Olympics which, due to Covid, had been truly held in 2021, which implies it’s solely three extra years till the 2024 Olympics are postponed to 2027.” — SETH MEYERS

“I hope you loved them, as a result of with world warming, even the Winter Olympics will quickly be the Summer time Olympics.” — DAVID SPADE, visitor host of “Jimmy Kimmel Dwell”

“However it was a magical two weeks. Night time after night time, People gathered across the TV to see the occasions the place we already noticed who gained on Twitter.” — JIMMY FALLON

“Now that the Video games are performed, the one place for an athlete to get herpes in another country is on ‘Bachelor in Paradise.’” — DAVID SPADE

“Now if you wish to witness bodily excellence, you’ll have to observe a flight attendant duct tape a drunk man to his seat.” — JIMMY FALLON

David Spade poked enjoyable at Monday night time’s finale of “The Bachelorette” whereas visitor internet hosting “Jimmy Kimmel Dwell.”

Barbra Streisand will pop by “The Tonight Present” on Tuesday.

On this week’s Popcast, The New York Occasions’s pop music staff discusses the musical and private evolution of the Grammy-winning chart-topper Billie Eilish.

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